Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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