How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
