Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.