Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!

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(323): View more from California

literally had 100 drinks last night.

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(210): View more from Texas

I molested 6 butterflies tonight

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(802): View more from Vermont

I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(480): View more from Arizona

my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment

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(303): View more from Colorado

I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?

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(773): View more from Illinois

Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.

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(708): View more from Illinois

No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.

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