OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
