May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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