if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
