Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
FUCK WHALES
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
