i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
