I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Randomize