Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Come see our sink grown plant.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
