It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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