I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize