you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
