yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize