We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
