Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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