And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
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She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
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Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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