I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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