You were right. It hurts to walk today.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
