I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
