Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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