You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
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