he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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