I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
