I need help removing her.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
