just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize