he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
