haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
