i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
