At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
