Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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