Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
