Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
