i jhust puked up my retainher.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize