I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
