"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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