Texts From Last Night

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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I really want to fuck my wifes sister.

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  (816): I really want to fuck my wifes sister. http://tfl.nu/nla0
  Replies (42) Good night (1244) Bad night (4526)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab

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  (917): i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab http://tfl.nu/gssq
  Replies (8) Good night (3117) Bad night (887)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad

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  (602): hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad http://tfl.nu/sh9o
  Replies (45) Good night (1018) Bad night (9717)
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  (707): View more from California

  he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"

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  (707): he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?" http://tfl.nu/pefr
  Replies (22) Good night (5824) Bad night (2348)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....

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  (731): He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars.... http://tfl.nu/aa23
  Replies (15) Good night (1365) Bad night (8335)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.

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  (413): All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet. http://tfl.nu/zopf
  Replies (13) Good night (3501) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night

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  (760): my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night http://tfl.nu/6buy
  Replies (4) Good night (2602) Bad night (824)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day

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  (316): I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day http://tfl.nu/h30u
  Replies (16) Good night (1588) Bad night (4033)
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  (716): View more from New York

  she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper

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  (716): she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper http://tfl.nu/z4y6
  Replies (28) Good night (5889) Bad night (1462)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?

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  (772): how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground? http://tfl.nu/issb
  Replies (19) Good night (4599) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.

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  (513): I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting. http://tfl.nu/f03u
  Replies (3) Good night (1124) Bad night (806)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"

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  (916): you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances" http://tfl.nu/1xse
  Replies (2) Good night (1201) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!

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  (787): Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud! http://tfl.nu/y0cl
  Replies (3) Good night (1232) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style

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  (603): I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style http://tfl.nu/6hvg
  Replies (1) Good night (488) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.

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  (+61): You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk. http://tfl.nu/xuxz
  Replies (1) Good night (454) Bad night (194)

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