i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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