Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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