And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
