Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
