I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
