Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
