Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
