I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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