Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
