So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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