Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
How does one acquire holy water?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
