So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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