That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize