um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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